I’ve been doing a ton of soul searching and deep diving on many levels this year, especially after this recent photography trip to the Pacific Northwest where I met up with 5 other female photographers to chat, share, and make art together. We planned to spend a few days immersed in nature, and working with almost a dozen different humans making beautiful portraits and celebrating where they are on their human journeys. This was one of those trips that cracked me open and made me question…. everything, LOL. It taught me so much about what being a photographer means to me, how I am able to make meaningful, impactful art, and about being a human. Not to mention it really lit up a lightbulb about how much nature is a part of connection.
What do I want to be when I grow up? What is art? What kind of photography do I want to make consistently? Should I get a part time job at Starbucks? So many questions popping up in thought bubbles in my mind!
I was able to really get clear on my WHY as an artist, to hone in on what I love and what I don’t love about photography, and to understand better what works for me (and what doesn’t). And I noticed, for me, there is a GIANT intersection in the Venn Diagram on what I need in terms of how I work as an artist, and what I need/crave/want as a human as well.
For both, it’s a resounding, LOUD answer.
CONNECTION.
For me to work at my best, to create deep, impactful art, there must be connection. And this is on 2 levels- stay with me! I promise it will make sense.
For the art I love making, that resonates with SOOOOO many people, the “AHA!” factor is connection.
What does that mean?
The First Level
I need to have a connection with my subject. That’s why, for all of my sessions, especially important for EmPOWERment sessions, Postpartum Portraits, or even solo portraits, we start off by TALKING. Like using our voices, in real life, either in person or on the phone. If we can’t do in person, second best is a Video Call. I need to know what your energy feels like, I need to see you, and ask you a number of important questions. I need to know why you chose me, as well as do you want to make these portraits. 99% of the time on these Clarity Calls, we find a mutual throughline where we intersect and resonate. Some of the defenses come down or fears melt away right then and there. That immediately takes things to the next level, allows for a sense of safety & comfort, which makes the artwork created that much deep and impactful.
Let’s face it, for a portrait to be magical, it takes two. I can bring all the right equipment, the experience, the creativity, the magic…..but if you are not fully present, vulnerable, trusting in me and in the process….it’s going to show. And getting comfortable being vulnerable takes time, and practice. It’s easier for some people than others right from the start. But like anything else, it’s like a muscle. You start, you practice, the more you do it, the easier it gets.
Once at the session, a big part of getting the environment ready is all the sensorial stuff. I employ the use of sounds (curated music for the right vibe), smells (candles, incense), tactile things (chunky knits, blankets, throw pillows, flowers), the light (which is why time of day REALLY matters), tastes (yup, depending on the kind of session, it can be anything from sweets, to coffee to wine). Taking a moment to ground ourselves, center ourselves, enjoy the making of the art….not just rushing into it. This matters in my process.
The second level
We as humans need to make the time, effort & insight to find the connection to our (higher) selves, and as an extension of that, our connection with source/the universe/God/whateveryouwannacallit. Being self-aware, learning who we are now, discovering aspects of ourselves that we didn’t know about before… taking that and transmuting into growth…..it’s huge. And it shows, in many ways. Personal growth is something that I value SUPER HIGHLY and I have been working on since I was a teenager, and yet there is always another layer of the onion to peel back. I mean, I was strongly reminded when I became a Mom that I was highly sensitive, because as it turned out my son was highly sensitive right out of the gate from day one. So, both of us being HSP’s was something I’ve known about since 2010. But as time goes on, and life goes on lifing, I’ve been able to identify quite a few other neurodivergent traits in myself that went unidentified until last year. Learning about those aspects and being able to make “life accommodations” for myself (and my kiddo at school) has changed everything. But again, with this it takes practice and dilligent follow through. And we will always stumble and fall along the way (legit, on the physical realm, I literally stumbled and fell at the waterfall location we were making portraits at and my art came to a screeching halt as I recalibrated and figured out if I could keep on going, or if was going to have to call it a day).
So, Part 1 of the self-reflection piece is learning, and accepting the quirks of who we are, and seeing that we are not alone. Part 2 is embracing (not just accepting) those quirks and learning how to navigate life differently, so we are able to really live life to the fullest and thrive and truly enjoy the time we have here on this big blue marble.
Connection (in general) is as necessary for me as the air I breathe. I didn’t always realize that. And as we get older and embrace the uniqueness of who we are, especially in midlife (unabashedly so, thanks menopause!) the harder it seems to find connection with others. Especially in today’s fast past, hustle culture. We are all so busy running on the hamster wheel, we fear we can’t stop for fear of stumbling and falling off.
But what if falling off the wheel is a blessing in disguise, and leads to a better path than a never-ending wheel?
So WTF does this have to do with photography? Especially my photography?
Working with me is a whole journey. That’s not for everyone, and I 10000% get that AND therefore I want to work with those that resonate with that idea and with me. So no, I don’t do mini-sessions. Been there, tried it, bought the t-shirt, then threw it away. There are many other “Say cheese! Now quickly move over there, tilt your head, okay that’s a wrap!” photographers out there, and I’m happy there are because there are plenty of clients seeking that.
But for those that not only appreciate my art, but also my process….it can be life changing. I’ve had many, many clients say that working with me on a session has been like therapy, and that is the biggest compliment you can give me.
So if this resonates with you, and you want to work with me, or chat with me to see if you’ like to work with me, please reach out. I’d love to connect. And I’d love to make artwork with you. Let me take you by the hand and guide you through an experience like the ones pictured here. It’s waaaaay more than a photo session (or so my clients tell me). It is a healing experience.
Until then, keep exploring. Traveling. And make time for connection. You won’t regret it.
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